“The Uni Experience”
To some of you, these words may seem like the most magical words in the world, whilst to others, maybe not…
Well, I’m one of the ‘maybe not’’ people.
I came to uni expecting the best and fearing a little, but it didn’t go as expected. Don’t get me wrong, this has been and still is an amazing experience, but it just turned out to be nothing I expected.
Let me break it down for you.
I don’t drink nor go out to party, and let’s just say it is very, very, very difficult to integrate or socialise when you aren’t willing to go out to every single Fresher’s social and get wasted out of your mind. This meant that when my housemates invited me to come out with them, I just told them I don’t really go out, trying to convey the message that I am not comfortable drinking nor staying out and about during the early hours of the morning in a new city. Although, now I think about it, they must have thought I’m an anti-social, inverted bug who stays in her room all day and all night.
I am also not the most confident person when it comes to socialising with people and since I had been so used to having the same group of friends for over 5 years, it was almost like I had forgotten how to build a friendship. So,I made small talk with my housemates and otherwise kept to myself, not leaving my room during their pre-drinks session and eventually not leaving my room very much at all. This wasn’t because my housemates made me feel uncomfortable or that they were mean, I was actually lucky compared to other people, but I just wasn’t friends with them, which made it hard for me to socialise with them. (If you are like me then you’ll understand what I’m talking about, if you aren’t,then you can’t really understand it unless you experience it).
As Fresher’s week eventually wore off,slowly lectures began and things just got worse. I had enrolled and had talked to two different people during enrolment week, but when term began, I never saw them and so I retreated to sitting by myself in every lecture. It seemed like everyone had already established friendships and I felt more alienated than ever. But, just like me, there were plenty of lone wolves here and there. As the days went by, I found myself repeatedly sitting next to a girl and I began talking to her. Although, we regularly sat next to each other and sometimes talked, I didn’t feel close to her. Then this girl (now my closest friend in uni) came and sat next to me, beginning with the same line I had used countlessly before, ‘Can I sit here…?’. Eventually, after every lecture we talked more and more and connected. As time went by, our friendship grew and I also started to talk more often with other people. As days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, my university experience seemed to get better and better, and I realised this was one of the best experiences in my life.
It is true that I began this experience regretting leaving home and feeling super home-sick especially when I missed out on my sibling’s birthday, and although I categorise myself as the housemate who is always locked in her room according to the Buzzfeed articles, I have fun.
I may not be getting drunk and partying away, I may not have found the love of my life and I may not have made hundreds of friends.But, I have been exploring this new city and enjoying it, I have made a really good friend who I will be moving in with next year and I will get my degree and walk out of here with my head held high.
So whatever you do in life, choose what makes you happy and even if it may seem to be super hard to begin with, things will get better, and if they don’t, you always have the choice to change it. It’s your life, live it and love it.
The Girl With A Name x